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Focus on what you *can* change

bikeAll too often people tell us that if we only changed what we thought then we would be feeling a whole lot better. This has some truth. Have you ever heard the statement ‘thoughts dictate our feelings and feelings dictate how we behave’? If this is true then imagine how much better we might feel if we focused on positive self-talk!

You don’t even have to be a whiz at positive self-talk either. A simple ‘you can do this’ or ‘I’m a worthy person who deserves to be alive’ is all you need to say to yourself. With practice you will get better at self-talk and over time you’ll you feel so much better about yourself.

When you focus on things such as positive self-talk and the things that you can change / work on, you are more likely to feel positive about yourself in your day-to-day life. You need to acknowledge and see what you do well in your daily life, and what you can choose to work to improve.

For example you may find it difficult to socialise with people who are positive in your life. So a goal might be finding a time and place to catch up with those positive people and challenging those thoughts that tell you that you don’t deserve them in your life.

It’s important to acknowledge what you do well. You need to celebrate your achievements. What do you do to be nice to yourself? How do you celebrate when things go well?

As human beings we are always learning and discovering new things. So how about trying something new that you have never done before? Give new strategies a go, allow yourself to grow and find strengths in yourself that you didn’t even know existed.

Don't be a victim of negative self-talk. Remember, you are listening.When we focus on things or situations that we cannot change it can overwhelm us with defeat. We can feel stuck, feel as though we are going around in endless circles, never getting anywhere new in life. It can also result in us having less energy or lack of motivation to want to work on our recovery. So with that being said wouldn’t it be more beneficial to focus on what we can change in our life?

One last point, no one can do these things for you. It is up to you to make positive changes in your life. No one can recover for you – but people can support you if you let them know of your journey. So try to focus on things you can change in your life and take comfort in knowing that you are a resilient  person who can achieve anything that you put your mind to.

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